Day 6: The Road to Recovery

Once I came to a place where I could honestly say that I had a problem, I tried like hell to avoid one thing…..Withdrawal.   I thought about going back to a drug and alcohol treatment facility, but that I wanted to avoid at all cost.  Not saying that drug and alcohol treatment centers are bad.  They have their place, and have certainly benefited many over the years.   Yet,  based off my last experience, I just felt it wasn’t the place for me.  I searched for alternatives, and came across a program online, using alcohol to gradually taper off, of alcohol.

Needless to say, this did not work for me.  Just my experience.  I’m not sure that there is any such thing as moderation, or tapering off for someone suffering from alcohol addiction.  And, again, that’s just my opinion.  For me this time around, it was cold turkey.  I know that not everyone agrees with that method either, and it poses a lot of concern/risks.   For myself, it’s the route I had to go, and here I am at day six.  That in itself has been amazing to me.

However, I must say, the past few days have been somewhat miserable.  The first few days, I felt kind of okay, physically.  But, day three came around, and it was a whole different story.  Day three through five I experienced the worst “hangover” ever.  And, I know the word “hangover” well.  The headache, nausea, chills, night sweats, and the ache in my liver was horrible.  I guess my liver had gone into overdrive to rid itself of the toxins.  And, then the sleepless nights.  Just lying in bed tossing and turning.  But, in looking back, that’s one of the reasons having a few glasses of wine in the evening appealed to me in the first place, and led me to where I am.   I have always been quite the insomniac, and realize that this is one of my triggers.  I actually struggled with the notion that one glass wouldn’t hurt, but I know the lie all too well.

Last night was another long sleepless night, but, I got up this morning feeling somewhat refreshed.  I’m feeling tired, but the “hangover” is gone.  I truly feel as though the worst is behind me, and the best is yet to come.   And, the greatest part is, I feel more clear-headed and stronger than I have in years.  I’m liking this feeling, and feel that I’m for the first time in a long time, on the road to recovery.  HB




About hrschbw

Hello, I'm Herschel. And, I'll be the first to say, that I am not a writer. Although, there was a day, long ago, that I considered writing as a career. Yet, life took me in a totally different direction. Today, I find myself just putting my thoughts down, simply with pen and paper. I'm a little old-fashioned maybe, in that sort of way. I simply find myself writing about whats real, and relevant to me, based off what life has given me. If what I write touches you, then my heart is truly at ease. For what it tells me, lets me know, that we are truly in this thing called "Life" together. And so, I thank each of you for taking the time to stop by, for liking my writings, and giving me the honor, that you would somehow follow me. And, so, I'm not a writer, a poet, or even perhaps a great blogger. All I can simply say, is that I write from a heart that's real, a place that somewhere along the way, I forgot existed.
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7 Responses to Day 6: The Road to Recovery

  1. Congratulations! I am in recovery from alcohol, cocaine and benzos too. It was very difficult coming off alcohol but now I’m 10 years clean.

  2. wrapme63 says:

    Congrats to You! Are you part of any support groups? Also, as a former nurse, I highly recommend Excellent quality supplements. Your body is going through a lot right now, and needs extra vitamins and minerals. Best to You. Michelle

    • hrschbw says:

      Thanks Michelle. Outside of my family and the various forums I’m involved in, I haven’t sought outside help. I have found tremendous strength and a desire to conquer this. I am taking a high quality multi-vitamin, and getting back to juicing which is something I had pretty much given up on. Thank you for your support and best wishes, and likewise.

  3. ERIC EASE says:

    Congratulations on 6 days. Oh man oh man do I remember the first couple of weeks when I decided to get clean. The first 7 to 10 days were the worse. I had all the symptoms you described but not being able to sleep I think was the worse. I had no appetite and I was anxious all the time. I used drugs and alcohol for almost 40 years my friend and I never thought that I would ever stop using. I am grateful that I have been able to go cold turkey and stay clean for 2 years and a month next week. Keep fighting the fight my friend the beginning is the hardest but it gets greater later. One day at a time. Lets keep in touch I am sure we can help each other.

    • hrschbw says:

      Thanks Eric, Yes, please, let’s do man. We can conquer this together my friend one day at a time. Congrats on being two years in. I’m looking forward to the day when I can say that. Last night was the worst as far as sleep goes. And, I’m not sure if I was asleep or awake, but I had the most vivid, crazy dreams, I had to get up twice in the night and remind myself that it wasn’t real. Is this normal man?

      • ERIC EASE says:

        Yes. You will have those dreams from time to time. The good news is the longer you stay clean the fewer the dreams. I still have them and some of my friends who have 15-20 years say they have them once in a while. It gets better brother as long as we stay the course.

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